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Wallow or Withstand?

February 20, 2019March 27, 2019https://gingersnaps.wordpress.comLeave a comment

“The tests we face in life’s journey are not to reveal our weaknesses but to help us discover our inner strengths. We can only know how strong we are when we strive and thrive beyond the challenges we face.”
― Kemi Sogunle

We all tend to wallow in our unfortunate circumstances at times. It gives us a little time to feel sorry for ourselves, and maybe, just maybe, get others to feel sorry for us too. But then, we must take the step to move on. Pick ourselves up. Dust ourselves off. And continue to travel along this journey called life.

What happens if you live your life continuing to wallow instead of choosing to withstand? You define yourself as the circumstance. Everything you do, every decision you make, everything you see is through a tainted lens. A perspective of … “well, this happened to me, so …” And unfortunately, I believe life passes you by.

I have written the stories of many of my friends here in Knysna, South Africa. So many tragedies. So much poverty. So many unfortunate circumstances. However, I love being able to share how many have overcome and withstood the test of this life. They don’t wallow in their circumstance nor allow it to define them. Instead, they learn from it, overcome it, withstand it and move forward. When I have them read their story in writing, they are amazed at all that they have truly withstood over the years.

Today, I’d like to introduce Dyllan. I met him 2-years ago when he was participating in the “Hands and Heart” program sponsored by Youth for Christ. He has wanted me to write his story since the first day I met him. “Why?”, I wondered. Everyone else is so reluctant to share their stories.

(*Sidenote – “Hands and Heart” is a 1-year skills training program. Boys who have dropped out of school are given the opportunity to learn basic construction skills and welding. They attend class 4-days per week for the entire year. From there, men in the community work on the boys’ behalf to help them secure jobs.)

When you read this young man’s story, it is obvious he has suffered through many serious health issues. No doubt. But you, the reader, must decide for yourself whether you think he will choose to wallow or withstand… Will he allow his circumstances to define who he is? Or will he push through?

Dyllan Muller, the ever smiling 21-year old, was born and raised in the Hornlee area of Knysna, in the Western Cape of South Africa. Hornlee is home mostly to the “Coloured” residents of Knysna. You can read a little bit more about the history of apartheid and designated living areas in “What is a South African “Township””.

Dyllan’s parents brought their baby boy home to their ever-growing family back in 1998. He was their third child joining a 3-year old brother and 5-year old sister.

Within 7 months of his life, he was diagnosed with kidney failure in both kidneys and placed on dialysis immediately. A 7-month old baby on dialysis. This became this little baby’s life. Traveling back and forth to Cape Town (a 5-hour drive away) to receive treatment at a much more equipped hospital.

By the time Dyllan reached age 3, his father walked out on the family. A story like so many others. Dyllan remembers his dad yelling at his mother often and believes he struggled with alcohol addiction.

So there they were. A single mom left to raise three young children on her own… one who was very ill. A child she must travel often with to Cape Town for treatments. And two she must leave behind each trip.

Throughout the years, Dyllan received Peritoneal Dialysis. He was either in the hospital in Cape Town or sent home with a machine. This worked for a couple of years until he developed a terrible abdominal infection at the age of 5.

(The most common problem with peritoneal dialysis is peritonitis, a serious abdominal infection. This infection can occur if the opening where the catheter enters your body becomes infected or if contamination occurs as the catheter is connected or disconnected from the bags. Infection is less common in catheters, which are placed in the chest. Peritonitis requires antibiotic treatment by your doctor. – nationalkidneycenter.org)

In order to treat the peritonitis, Dyllan was placed on strong antibiotics. He was then switched to Hemodialysis, where they inserted a catheter into his neck while he continued to wait for a kidney transplant.

During the course of his treatments, Dyllan’s hearing declined. He tried to keep up with school. It was tough.

By grade 5, Dyllan was 12 years old and his health was failing drastically. He missed the entire year of school as he was in and out of the hospital. He finally received a kidney transplant in 2011. Things were looking up.

When he returned to school, the administration pushed him through grades 6 and 7. He was not passing. Not receiving the educational foundation he needed. Still he was moved ahead.

While attending grade 7 at age 15, Dyllan’s hearing had declined so much that he had become completely deaf in both ears. The doctors believe that it was caused by the intense antibiotics and treatments he received over the years. This young kidney recipient was now deaf.

Learning of his story, a doctor in Cape Town suggested that Dyllan would qualify for a Cochlear Implant through Stellenbosch University’s Project Hope. This meant that the surgery would be subsidized if Dyllan’s mom could raise R30,000 of the R189,00 needed (approx. $3,000 of $15,000). This is a lot of money for most people, let alone a single mom working for minimum wage (approx. $12 per day… not per hour… per day).

Dyllan’s community heard of his need. They showed up in a big way. The students and faculty at his school, Sunridge Primary, joined together to donate money. The local newspaper printed an article asking for supporters. It worked! Dyllan received a Cochlear Implant in 2012 and can now hear in one ear.

Dyllan was happy he could hear again. But going into the surgery as a 15-year old, Dylan knew nothing about Cochlear implants. He had no idea that when he awoke from surgery, he would have a permanent small box attached to his head. Nobody prepared him. Now, 7 years later, he still won’t allow people to see it. He wears a hat or headband at all times.

Everything should be fine now, right? Not quite. Dyllan was so far behind in school. Even though he wasn’t passing, he kept getting pushed along, until he finally dropped out in Grade 10.

This decision left Dyllan with few choices of a future career. A decision made by so many boys in the townships. But then Dyllan got a break. He was accepted into Youth for Christ’s “Hands and Heart Program” where he learned basic construction skills. He completed the program and secured a job.

A dream for many high school dropouts.

Weeks after beginning his construction job, Dyllan quit. Due to his previous health issues, he felt he really shouldn’t be doing heavy lifting. Unfortunately he has not found another job in the past 2-years.

So, I ask you… Is he wallowing or is he withstanding?

I believe Dyllan is at a crossroads in his life.

Dyllan can either see himself as a boy who suffered kidney failure and lost his hearing. Thus putting many conditions on possible jobs. A boy who wants to tell his story so that others will feel sorry for him and continue to wallow in his circumstance.

Dyllan can see himself as a successful kidney recipient who has had his hearing restored with a cochlear implant. A young man with a second lease on life. A person who has withstood the unfortunate circumstances life has given him and wants to tell his story to others to inspire them.

Only time will tell if Dyllan will wallow and let his unfortunate circumstance define who he is. Or if he will withstand the test and see the blessings he has received.

The choice is his.

Almost … but not quite.

February 10, 2019March 27, 2019https://gingersnaps.wordpress.com1 Comment

“Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty.” – Mother Teresa

Have you ever experienced the “Almost … but not quite”? You almost made the team, but not quite. You almost got into the Honor Society, but not quite. You almost crossed the finish line first, but not quite. You almost passed the test, but not quite. We can all think of times we had an “almost … but not quite” scenario. We wanted something so badly, but we just missed the mark.

It is a frustrating, disappointing and heartbreaking place to be.

Now imagine being almost part of a family, but not quite. Feeling unwanted. Given a place to live out of obligation. Sitting on the fringes of the family circle. Nobody rejoicing in your successes. Nobody helping bear the burden of your hurts and disappointments. You are just the niece. Just the cousin. Just another mouth to feed. Just a burden.

Ntsibeng Shete is a 21-year old Sotho girl whom I met 2 years ago (January 2017). At that time, she was in her metric (senior) year at Concordia High School in the Knysna Township with her hopes set on attending university. She and I worked together after school navigating through Life Science.

(Side Note: Sotho /su:tu is one of many tribes in South Africa. The sotho people speak a language called Sesotho. It is one of the eleven official languages of South Africa. This is Ntsibeng’s native tongue. She now speaks Sesotho, Isixhosa and English).

Born in 1997 in the Mtata Township on the Eastern Cape, Ntsibeng’s life began with tragedy. She almost had a dad in her life, but not quite. Two weeks after she was born, her father died of complications from diabetes. She would never get to know a father’s love.

Instead, her family would be all women… Ntsibeng, mom and grandma. A common family unit in South Africa’s Townships. Absent dads. Present grandmothers.

This could and should work. It did for six years. Then Ntsibeng’s mom grew restless and decided it was time to make a change. So she did. She moved several hours away to the Western Cape and left Ntsibeng behind. Yes, she left her 6-year old daughter behind. Ntsibeng felt abandoned.

For the next four years, Ntsibeng lived alone with her grandma. Although she longed for her mom to return, Ntsibeng loved her grandma dearly. “She was my everything”, she said with a big smile on her face.

Little did this young girl know how drastically her life was about to change in 2007. She was 10-years old and excited that her mom decided to return from the Western Cape. What she didn’t know was that her mom was very ill. She had contracted HIV and TB while away. She had also given birth to a son who Nsibeng knew nothing about. A 4-year old little brother.

As she began to process these new life changes, the return of her mom and the introduction of a younger brother, Ntsibeng’s grandma was diagnosed with and died of breast cancer. 2007 proved to be a very emotional year for such a young girl. A roller coaster of emotions. Heartbreak in the loss of her grandmother. Joy in the return of her mom and new brother. Ntsibeng was still so young. She believed things would be OK. They would begin to live as a new family unit.

Or would they? “Almost … but not quite.”

In July of 2008, only one year later, her mom got worse. Ntsibeng, 11-years old at the time, remembers her mom telling her to go find someone to help. She ran out of the house to find a neighbor, but when she returned, her mom had already passed away. Ntsibeng honestly believes that her mom sent her away so that she would not watch her die. One final act of love from a mom with whom she had spent so little time. A relationship almost mended, but not quite.

Funerals are expensive. Especially to those living in poverty. To pay for these expenses, the relatives had to sell the grandmother’s house. This in turn left an 11-year old girl and 6-year old boy with no place to live. What would happen next? The decision was made to separate the sibliings. Baxolele (her brother) would remain in the Eastern Cape and live with his grandmother’s sister. Ntsibeng would be sent to the Western Cape to live with her mom’s brother and his wife.

With so much chaos, turmoil and uprooting in her life, Ntsibeng missed a lot of school. She arrived in Knysna in 2009, and almost passed grade 4, but not quite. She would have to repeat.

The years moved along. Life in her uncle’s home was hard. His wife refused to accept Ntsibeng as “their” child. They had their own children. Ntsibeng was just the niece. A “Cinderella” life style ensued. Ntsibeng felt like the unwanted outsider. Made to do all of the chores while her cousins played. Foster care money was received, but not spent on Ntsibeng. She still remembers having no clothes that fit. “When I moved up to High School (grade 8), I still had to wear the primary school uniform for quite some time,” she said sadly. It was embarrassing for her.

Finally in 2014, when entering grade 9, Ntsibeng was able to convince her mom’s sister to allow her to live with her family in the same township in Knysna. Baxolele joined her there (from the Eastern Cape), filling the 2-bedroom concrete block home with 9 people. Ntsibeng and Baxolele were sent to sleep outside in a wooden shack with no water or electricity. Unfortunately, the same “Cinderella” life style began to unfold for her. After all, she was once again, just the niece. Her aunt and uncle had many of their own children to care for.

The concrete home.

Inside the 2-bedroom home.

Ntsibeng watched her cousins participate in extra curricular activities, but to her, the answer was always “No, we don’t have enough money.” It was made clear from the start of her matric year, that they would only support their daughter to University.

Ntsibeng’s shack.

Inside Ntsibeng’s shack.

Ntsibeng started to flounder. What would she do now? She wanted to continue her education, but was not accepted into University for 2018. Her marks were almost high enough, but not quite. She knew she had to rewrite two of her courses in order to apply again for 2019.

Since that would be at the end of 2018, she decided to get a job to get her through the year. She saw an ad for a job at the hospital at the information desk. She applied, interviewed and got the job.

20180315_080804 — Ntsibeng dressed for a job interview.

Ntsibeng struggles with feeling loved by family. Although she was fortunate that relatives allowed her to stay with them over the years, she never felt as though she was looked at as “their” daughter. Instead, she was always an outsider. Almost part of each family, but not quite.

This year, Ntsibeng was accepted to the University of Fort Hare in the Eastern Cape. She almost started her college career, but not quite. She panicked. She had never been to see the University. She knew she would have to look for accommodations. She had nobody to counsel her or willing to go with her to sort things out. She could not get herself to make the 6-1/2 hour trek there with so much uncertainty. So, she didn’t go. A missed opportunity. A setback for another year.

Ntsibeng is a sweet girl. She continues to bounce back from life’s disappointments. This week she has applied to and is training for a server job in a restaurant. She knows that her aunt and uncle want her out. If she lands this job, she just may be able to rent a shack of her own.

Hopefully next year, 2020, Ntsibeng will be a University Student. She does not need another “almost … but not quite” year!

“C”ooking Good!

January 25, 2019March 27, 2019https://gingersnaps.wordpress.comLeave a comment

“Keep your heart open to dreams. For as long as there’s a dream, there is hope, and as long as there is hope, there is joy in living.” ~ Author Unknown

Dreams. We all begin dreaming of our future at a very young age. Preschoolers proudly proclaim their future occupation at their graduation ceremony… Fire Fighter, Doctor, Vet, Super Hero and Princess to name a few. They believe they can be whatever they want to be.

My new friend Siphenkosi Sihono also has a dream — to be a chef. “I really enjoy cooking,” the 24-year old told me over a hamburger the other day.

But unlike many of us, dreaming of a future was not something Siphe (pronounced See-pay) did as a youngster. With so many obstacles and failures in his life, why dare to dream?

Born in the Eastern Cape of South Africa in a village outside of Mount Frere, Siphe’s mom relinquished him to his grandmother’s care, immediately after his birth. “Why?”, you may ask. She was married at the time… but not to her baby boy’s father. She knew her husband would never accept him nor allow her son to grow up in their household.

And so began his life … Siphe would grow up in his grandmother’s wooden home with no running water and no electricity. He became part of a household where 9 other cousins were already living. A very poor family where enough food was often a challenge.

But when asked how his life was growing up, Siphe responded, “My Gogo (grandmother) is a good woman.” His grandmother made them a family. She gave them a place to live and provided what little she could. He was happy.

(Side Note… Mount Frere is a very small, underdeveloped town in the Eastern Cape. The closest residents to the town live in rural villages ruled by Tribal Chiefs. These villages are still lacking basic services like proper roads, electricity and water. River water is still used by many who don’t have water tanks to collect their water.)

Throughout the years, Siphe’s mom would visit him when she could. His father did not. He had no contact with his dad until he was 16-years old.

None the less, life went on… Siphe attended the only primary school in the village where the education was very poor. When he started High School, the only school around was 5 kilometers away. With no transportation available, he hiked to and from school each day. There he attended but failed to pass Grade 9.

It was then that Siphe learned that his father, was moving to Knysna with his wife. Knowing that the schools were better in the Western Cape, Siphe asked if he could move with them. He pleaded his case for a better education. Surprisingly, his father and his wife agreed.

In 2013, Siphe moved to the Knysna township with his dad and stepmom. They rented a wooden shack with no electricity and no running water. Siphe didn’t complain. He was used to that way of life. This was his chance to get a better education. This was going to be the turning point in this 18-year old’s life. He was starting a new school in a new town.

Throughout the school year, things in his household deteriorated. His dad was drinking. The yelling started. His stepmom left. The turmoil took a toll on Siphe. His studies suffered. He failed grade 9 again.

Siphe was now 19-years old, with no hope of finishing High School. His dad had given up on him and insisted he get a job.

His goal to finish school, had become unachievable. This only confirmed why you do NOT dare to dream!

As he walked around town handing out his CV (resume), a woman took notice. She was the manager at the grocery store and saw that he was 19-years old and had not yet completed and passed grade 9. Unacceptable. This boy must be in school. She contacted our friend Ella to see if she could help.

Ella and her business partner Penny met with Siphe and gently encouraged him to move into Ella’s Safe House and return to school. Siphe took them up on the offer and moved into the Lukhanyiso Safe House. So, at 19-years old, Siphe would attend Grade 9 again at a different high school in the same Knysna township. Would the third time be the charm?

Siphe, earlier years.

Siphe wins Mr. Personality at South Cape College.

Yes! He passed grade 9 with a bit of struggle. But he passed! And it was now time for this 20-year old to have some privacy and be a little more independent. He was so much older than the other children in the Safe House, so Ella moved Siphe into a wooden house on property her mother owned. Due to a dispute over the land, Siphe’s new shack became a target. It was burned to the ground with the few things he owned.

Time to give up? Throw in the towel? He was struggling with his grades so much, that even Ella recommended he leave school in grade 10 and learn a trade.

Siphe wasn’t ready to give up. He was determined to achieve his goal. And he did. He successfully completed and passed, not only grade 10, but 11 and 12! He matriculated (graduated) from high school at age 22.

As I spoke with Siphe and to others about him, it is obvious he has never been one to get into trouble. He is very respectful and endearing with a squeaky clean reputation. He put his nose to the grindstone, stayed out of trouble and accomplished his goal of finishing high school.

Siphe now dares to dream of a future. He wants to be a chef! He envisions himself working as a chef on a cruise line or in a hotel. When asked if he had ever been on a boat, his answer was “No, never.” Hmmm, I think he may want to go on a boat ride before accepting any jobs on the water!

Working toward his new dream, Siphe, with financial support from the Khayamandi Foundation, is currently attending South Cape College in Oudtshoorn, South Africa. He is beginning Year 2 of a 3-year program where he will earn a diploma in Hospitality and Catering. His classes include Catering Theory, Applied Management, Safety and Sanitation, and Nutrition and Menu Planning. As part of the program he must complete practicals where he works in the industry.

Siphe has to work hard to succeed. Schooling does not come easy to him. But he is determined to succeed and is willing to put in the work. He now knows he can accomplish his goals and dare to dream of a future!

siphe 4

Knysna, South Africa – Year Five

January 15, 2019March 27, 2019https://gingersnaps.wordpress.com1 Comment

“A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.”– Walter Winchell

Thank you for joining me on our journey again this year! Many of you may have followed along last year and learned about why Kurt and I travel to South Africa (annually since 2014). However, some of you may be reading this blog for the first time. So let me start by reposting our story of how we got here from the blog The Journey Begins…

“Why are you in South Africa?”, you may ask. Well it is a story only God could write…

For many years, I would always joke with people saying that when Kurt retires, he will probably “drag” me to some 3rd World country to be in ministry. Fast forward, here we are in Knysna, South Africa. It isn’t 3rd World, but it is definitely 2nd World.

So how did we get here? After Kurt retired in January 2014, he began to meet with the University of Virginia to learn about their water purification “system” (local potters make porous pots lined with silver), in Limpopo, South Africa. After meeting with those involved with this project a couple of times, they recommended he go visit the site in order to understand the site work that needed to be designed. Since he and I decided I would go with him, we thought we would make a vacation out of the trip down (as it would probably be the ONLY time we would ever come to Africa).

One problem, we knew nothing about Africa. I certainly did not realize how big the continent is compared to North America. Africa is bigger than China, India, the contiguous U.S. and most of Europe—combined! So, how do I begin to plan a trip? I would tap into my resources or as many would call, FRIENDS.

I happened to know only one couple that had ever been to Africa and their trip was to Kenya, not South Africa. But as God would have it, this couple had just recently met a man who was born and raised in South Africa, but now lives in Augusta, Georgia. My friend recommended I email his friend to see if he could help me plan an itinerary. After several emails back and forth with this man I had never met, Kurt decided that this project with UVA was not a good fit. Wow, disappointment. This man in Georgia has spent so much of his time helping me plan a vacation and now I needed to tell him we were not going to go. I felt bad to have wasted his time.

God had other plans! It was now August or so and instead of my new email friend saying oh well, so sorry for you; he said that he was taking a mission team to Knysna, South Africa at the beginning of November and invited us to come with him. I promptly said “Thank you” but “No Thank You”, we have already allocated that money to be used for something else… that may or may not have been completely true.

My new friend did not take “no” for an answer. Instead he told me to talk to Kurt and pray about it. Ugh, why did he have to bring God into this? I know that if I pray about it, I may have to say “yes”. Dilemma, do I tell Kurt we’ve been invited?

Yes, I did. And after much prayer, we decided to join the team.

Now, it is January 2019 and we have returned to Knysna 6 times over the past 5 years. We love the people here and have made forever friends.

Last year, we were able to transition the program I launched in 2016 called Girls Talk into the ministry of the local Youth for Christ. This was a dream come true. I knew from the start that the program would not be sustainable unless a local organization could oversee it and provide the necessary resources. At the same time, this provided a full-time professional job for my friend Thokozile, God-size Dreams.

Kurt spent his time teaching basic carpentry skills to young men who did not complete the 9th grade. To learn about their final project, please read Opening Their Hearts and Home ). He will do this again this year with a new group of guys.

So, with all of that said, and just arriving back here 2 days ago, I am not sure what this trip will bring. Kurt and I made a trip up to the township this morning to meet with some friends. We both left a little discouraged to see the circumstances of some of their households.

I hope to spend time getting to know the stories of more people here again. I plan to share them with you and give you updates on those you met last year.

As you have seen in the past, however sad or tragic these stories can be, many are so inspirational. Through it all, our God remains faithful. ~Tracy Cooper

Opening Their Hearts and Home

March 31, 2018March 27, 2019https://gingersnaps.wordpress.com1 Comment

“It’s not the size of your house that makes a home… It’s the size of your heart.” ~Jane Lee Logan

In June 2017, Maria and her husband Freddy opened their hearts and home, doubling the size of their family overnight. They have six children of their own. Yet in June, they agreed to take in six of Maria’s cousin’s children who became orphaned.

unnamed-6 — The orphaned siblings with Maria and Ella. Frederick, the oldest did not move to Knysna.

Maria grew up in the Eastern Cape of South Africa. At the age of 20 years old, she had her first daughter with a man to whom she was not married. Then 3 years later, she had her second daughter. Maria is a strong woman and began raising these girls on her own.

At the age of 26, she met Freddy, the man of her dreams. They fell in love and were married. They just celebrated their 26th wedding anniversary! Freddy is a good man. He has always worked hard to take care of Maria and their children. For years, the only work he could find was in Knysna, two hours away from his family. He moved there to work and traveled home when he could to see his family. This is so typical of families. If the father is still involved with the family, he may have to live in another town to work, only seeing his family on occasion.

While he worked in Knysna, Freddy stayed with Maria’s sister. She lived in an area of the township that was very underdeveloped at the time. No roads. No concrete block homes. No water. No electricity. This was now Freddy’s home away from home. He would work all day long and often help neighbors at night and on the weekends. He is a handy man. Someone who can fix almost anything. And he is always willing to help. One neighbor took notice of his kindness to the community. She starting talking with him about his work, his family and his plans. She wanted to know if he planned to move his family to Knysna.

Of course Freddy would love to do that, but where would they live? He and his wife had six children! The woman was full of compassion. She told Freddy that she wanted to give her land to him so that he could move his family to Knysna. A piece of land full of brush and vegetation. No buildings. So much potential. Wow.

Freddy couldn’t wait to tell Maria. But she held back her excitement. She had concerns. She didn’t know this woman. What if they accepted the offer, built a home on the property, and then the woman turned around and took the land back. Valid concern.

Freddy returned to Knysna a few days later and addressed Maria’s concern with the woman. She so wanted to give them this gift. She insisted Freddy go with her to the magistrate where she signed the land over to him. It was now legal. No strings attached. A priceless gift. Maria and I both agree… a true blessing from God.

Freddy got to work building his family a wooden house. Actually one that feels large inside because he designed it with high ceilings. When it was finished, the 8 of them moved in. The home had a kitchen and two bedrooms. No bathroom.

unnamed-5 — Maria standing in front of the Wooden home Freddy built 13 years ago. The blue RDP house is in the back.

Life was good. Not easy. But good. They were surrounded by bush. No roads. No running water. No electricity. No sanitation. But they were all together again! Within a couple of years, that part of the township (Dam Se Bos) began to develop. The government brought roads, water lines, sanitation and electricity to that area. RDP homes (Reconstruction and Development Programme) were being built. A few years ago, Maria and Freddy qualified for their small government home (2 bedrooms / 1 bathroom). This now stands directly behind the wooden house.

Side note: The RDP program was initiated by the ANC Party under the leadership of Nelson Mandela. Poverty is the single greatest burden of South Africa’s people, and is the direct result of the apartheid. As part of this program, people in poverty have the opportunity to receive a free home. Those eligible must meet these qualifications: Must be a South African citizen; over the age of 21; married or living with a partner OR single with dependants; earn less than R3,500 ($295 U.S.) per household per month. The problem is that it can take years before your home is built. I know some people that have been waiting 15-20 years.

This brings us to June 2017. Maria got a call from family members telling her that her cousin had been murdered. She was stabbed in front of her home, in front of her children. She was an alcoholic and apparently got into an altercation with another woman, leading to her death. Six children were now orphaned. Their mother was dead and their alcoholic father had been murdered (stabbed) a year earlier. It is so hard to imagine what these children went through in that household.

Maria, who didn’t really even know the children, was begged by relatives to take them in. If Maria did not take them, they would be separated and put into foster care. She did what came naturally. She prayed.

Maria felt God tugging on her heart. She must give these orphans a chance. So off she and Freddy went to pick up 6 more children to join their family.

unnamed — The youngest sisters recently orphaned.

Maria’s two oldest daughters had already moved away. One lives in Capetown and one lives in Johannesburg. However, they each have one child a 4-year old girl and a 2-year old boy that live with Maria and Freddy.

If you are trying to keep a head count, here it is… In the household resides: Freddy, Maria, 4 of their children (3 in high school and a 25-year old who just had a baby), 3 grandchildren and 6 of her cousin’s children. A total of 15 people. 4 bedrooms. 1 bathroom. Yes, 1 bathroom. Things are a little crowded, to say the least.

Maria and her newest grandson, Favian.

Maria’s grandson, Davian.

Not only that, the financial struggle is very real. Freddy has a maintenance job (actually in the neighborhood where we rent a house). He works hard all week long and then pastors a church in his community on Sundays. I don’t know Freddy’s salary, but it would be typical for him to make around $17 U.S. per day. He is the only bread-winner in the home.

Praise God my friends Penny and Ella (Emzini Tours), who I mentioned in the blog posts “Unprotected-Part 1” and “Unprotected – Part 2”, have partnered with Freddy and Maria to help provide for the orphans. They pay for school uniforms, transport to school, school fees and some food expenses. It is a necessary blessing for the family.

To help Maria and Freddy with space, Kurt and our friend Don have been teaching a group of 8 guys basic carpentry skills. These boys did not complete high school, some cannot read. This was an opportunity to teach them some basic skills to hopefully make them a little bit more employable. Their final project was to build a 12 X 12 sleeping room onto Freddy and Maria’s home. This gives the family space to move 4 -6 of the children into a room of bunk beds.

unnamed-28 — The finished sleeping room.

The project was amazing. Not only did it give Maria’s family more sleeping space, it was such an exciting accomplishment for the young boys in the class.

Freddy and Maria are Christians. Maria praises our Savior all day long. It gives me such joy to visit and see her love for our Lord. Together this couple teaches their children kindness, compassion, love, grace and mercy. They instill in them the importance of an education. Maria told me that in her house, nobody is allowed to drop out of school. They are raising these children to be good productive members of society.

Because Freddy and Maria opened their hearts and their home, six children have a new lease on life. I am thankful that they obeyed God’s call on their lives. Well done good and faithful servants! ~Tracy Cooper